The Pork Chop Dinner that Almost Wasn’t

On the weekends, when I leave Alex to fend for himself much of the day while I head off to my new part-time gig at a local bed&breakfast, I hand off a carefully composed list of tasks–things that I need help getting done around the house. You know, the types of chores small projects with which he can occupy himself if he gets bored in my absence.

One item on this weekend’s list was to buy 2 boneless pork chops for our dinner that evening.

Me: (as I pack up my lunch) Okay, babe, here’s your list. If you don’t get to anything else, make sure to pick up some pork chops because that’s what I want to make for dinner.

Alex: Okay, got it.

…Several hours later…Our protagonist arrives at his local Whole Foods Market

Alex: (to himself) I love to eat bananas with my cereal, I’ll get a nice bunch of those–I know Jess would want me to buy organic. Oh, you know what I really want? Chips and fresh salsa! What a great snack during the week… There’s so much stuff here…Hey I wonder if that goat’s milk gouda ever came in...(approaches cheese counter) Hi, do you guys have that goat’s milk gouda?

Cheese monger: Yes, we finally got it in! It’s right here. 

Alex: Oh, awesome!

Cheese monger: Do you like goat cheese?

Alex: I love it.

Cheese monger: Here, you have to try this raw goat milk cheese. Let me cut you a slice.

Alex: Wow, that’s good. Thank you! (to himself) Jess is going to be so happy…Oo crostinis are on sale? … Okay, I guess that’s it. (approaches checkout line)

Cashier: Did you find everything you needed today?

Alex: Yep. (pays for groceries, takes bag and leaves)

Upon exiting the store, our hero realizes he fell prey to the grocery store’s male shopper booby trap: he failed to purchase the one item he was sent to retrieve in the first place. He laughs to himself, re-enters the store, purchases the pork chops and heads home. Good man. End scene.

Grilled Mustard-Glazed Pork Chops with Honeyed Peaches
Yum Factor: Alex – 8.8, Jessalyn – 8

Prep order: 1. Marinate pork. 2. Prep and bake peaches. 3. Grill pork.

– 2 boneless pork chops
– 2 garlic cloves, minced
– big spoonful dijon mustard
– generous splash balsamic vinegar
– salt and pepper
– enough extra-virgin olive oil to help the marinade come together

1. Whisk together marinade ingredients. Pour into ziploc bag. Add pork chops. Massage. Refrigerate 2+ hours.

2. Peel and slice 2 peaches. Place in center of a large square of aluminum foil. Drizzle with a small spoonful of your favorite honey. Carefully fold the foil into a tightly closed packet around the peaches. Bake at 325F about 20 minutes.

3. Remove pork chops from marinade. Place on preheated grill and cook on high about 6 minutes per side. Use remaining marinade to baste meat.

To serve, top pork chop with peaches. How about a nice salad on the side?

No photo was taken of this meal. I was too distracted gobbling up goat’s milk gouda and re-watching this Jerry Seinfeld bit:

(Watch until at least 1:25 and you’ll see one interpretation of the previously described grocery store male booby trap)

Instead of a photo of our dinner plates, would you settle for a cute, recent picture of the dog, instead?


One thought on “The Pork Chop Dinner that Almost Wasn’t

  1. Alan says:

    Why does that story not surprise me in the least??….

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